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| Image by Robin Higgins from Pixabay |
Think about the last time you argued with someone else because they didn't understand your feelings? Or when was the last time you had a conflict with someone else because you couldn't understand how they felt? In both cases, emotional intelligence may play a role in the underlying conflict.
Emotional intelligence can play a major role in the way we interact with others. Sometimes coworkers, friends, family members and other acquaintances may have poor emotional skills, making social situations difficult and stressful. On the one hand, it could also be your own emotional intelligence skills that need to be improved.
A person's level of emotional intelligence is often referred to as EQ. The weakness of a person's strong EQ can actually be known based on his daily life. The characteristics and signs of weak EQ can be seen from the nature of a person, for example emotional, assertiveness, and also easy or not susceptible to stress and so forth. Here are some common signs of low emotional intelligence.
1. Like noise
You might know someone who likes to clash with other people. Friends, family, coworkers, and even strangers are always involved in disputes with these argumentative individuals. That's because individuals with weak EQ actually struggle to understand the emotions of others, but they argue without considering the feelings of others.
2. Can not understand the feelings of others
People with weak EQ are unable to realize the feelings of others. They can't realize that their partner might be angry or their coworker upset because of the statement that comes out of their mouth. Not only that, they don't want to know when others expect them to learn to understand how they feel. People who are weak in EQ are usually not able to recognize their own emotions, so the words spoken come out without control.
3. Thinking that other people are too sensitive
People with low EQ might make jokes at the wrong time. For example, they might make jokes when the atmosphere is grieving or after a tragic event. When others reprimand their actions, individuals with low EQ may feel others are too sensitive. These people have difficulty understanding the emotions of others who are grieving, so it's no wonder why they can't capture the emotional atmosphere after such a sad event.
4. Refusing to listen to other people's views
Individuals with low EQ feel that they are always right and will continue to maintain their position as such, but refuse to listen to what others have to say. They are often pessimistic and overly critical of other people's feelings. When there are situations that they think are wrong, people with weak EQ usually feel uncomfortable, anxious, and frustrated.
5. Blaming others
People with low emotional intelligence do not know that their own emotions can cause problems. When things go wrong, their first instinct is to blame others. They often blame the situation or behavior of others for their actions. They may have no other choice with what they have done, and other people also do not understand their situation. The tendency to be irresponsible often makes them feel irritable and victimized.
6. Not being able to handle the situation imposed on him
People with weak EQ have a tendency to throw responsibility. These people will stay away from such situations to avoid making themselves much trouble. He could also try to hide their true emotions from others.
7. Sparks of spontaneous emotions
The ability to regulate emotions is one of the five important components of emotional intelligence. People with low EQ often have difficulty understanding and controlling their emotions. They have unexpected emotional outbursts that seem excessive and uncontrollable.
8. Difficulty maintaining friendship
Because low EQ people are often seen as rude and heartless, they have difficulty maintaining friendships. Intimate friendship requires mutual giving and receiving, sharing emotions, affection, and emotional support, all of which are not possessed by those with low EQ.
9. Lack of empathy
Because people with low emotional intelligence do not understand the emotions of others, they experience a little empathy for others. They cannot be compassionate to what other people feel, so it is impossible for them to put themselves in the shoes of other people.
If you think that your emotional skills are lacking, start by learning more about the five main components of emotional intelligence. Psychologist Daniel Goleman argues that there are at least 5 important components in emotional intelligence, namely:
1. Self-awareness
Self-awareness is the ability to recognize and understand one's own emotions and this is the most important part of emotional intelligence. Through this self-awareness a person will be very aware of the consequences of the actions that he does both for himself and others. To reach the level of "self-awareness" one must ask oneself about the strengths and limitations that they have. Goleman stated that people who have good self-awareness will have a soul of humor, confidence in their abilities and capacities and be aware of other people's views of him.
2. Self-regulation
In addition to having self-awareness, emotional intelligence requires that you also have the ability to regulate and manage emotions. You must learn to manage a conflict well. People who have good self-regulation will easily adapt to changing conditions around them.
3. Socialization skills
The ability to interact and socialize with others is an important aspect of emotional intelligence. A person must be able to be a human who is easy to get along with so as not to be individualistic. In the world of work, having many coworkers will be more comfortable than being ostracized and unpopular workers. The ability of this socialization includes the ability of communication, listening, leadership, body language communication and others.
4. Empathy
Empathy is the ability to understand the feelings and conditions of others. You must be sensitive to the feelings of others be it happy, sad, hopeless, frustrated and others. You must be able to position yourself as part of their feelings. That way other people will feel they have a partner in life. In career, empath can open up the qualities of other people even superiors that we have never known. That way we can anticipate and understand what is happening with our coworkers.
5. Motivation
Encouragement from within is part of emotional intelligence. In their blood will flow generating energy that leads someone to the peak of success. The encouragement can be from various things ranging from money, fame, praise, self-recognition. Those who have good motivation will tend to be oriented towards real action by setting goals, achieving the best achievements possible and always trying to provide the best in their work. They also tend to have many initiatives at work.
Poor emotional intelligence can cause problems in various areas of one's life. Schools, work, family, friendships, and romantic relationships are just a few areas where someone with low EQ will face big problems. Hopefully this article useful and happy introspection.